Kebler's son, Ryan Kebler, 40, reports that he and his family were visiting his mother and father, enjoying breakfast when his father said, referring to his wife, "I never get to talk to her anymore. She's always on the e-mail."

"I was a bit taken aback at first, you know, like when you know you heard something weird but couldn't figure out what exactly was weird about it," says the younger Kebler. "At first, I thought it was because he had drawn out the 'E' in 'e-mail'. He kind of said 'eeee-mail'." He reports that it was only a couple of minutes later that he realized what the real concern was.

Kassy Kebler, 19, Ryan's daughter and granddaughter to Jack, says, "At that point we were all kinda looking at each other with this knowing look, because we knew that grandpa maybe was getting too old to stay at home, or something. I mean, who says that?!"

Since yesterday morning more alarming misuses of the definite article have been heard, increasing the family's concern for Jack's old age and frailty. Ryan says, "Yesterday afternoon, he was reading an article on marijuana and said, 'What's with

Kebler always wanted to do some theatre after he retired

these young kids today, always smoking the pot?' It was horrible. My wife just broke down crying. I'm doing okay, I'm mostly worried about the grandchildren. I don't know if they can take it."

Others have noticed the age-induced verbal quirk as well. Neighbor Vince Bardone, 60, says that while taking out his garbage yesterday he saw Kebler and they started discussing the stock market.

"We were talking about tech stocks when [Kebler] said, 'It's those kids, always playing the video games.' I didn't understand and asked him, 'Playing which video games?' thinking he was referring to specific ones, but he said, 'You know, playing all of 'em, they're everywhere these days, the video games.' I realized at that point that he didn't realize he was using improper grammar and that he was old. It really hits home, he's only five years older than me. I can only hope that I die in my sleep instead of going through the agonizing hell Jack is going to be living through."

The family, still in shock has already started calling nursing homes. "Just to get rates and start the process," says Ryan as his wife rolls her eyes behind him, "We haven't made any decisions yet."