At an afternoon press conference, a spokesman for your state's Department of Transportation said that a new report commissioned by the department showed that the right lane of that road near your house is still closed. Additionally, there will continue to be no work occurring in the blocked area for at least two more months.

The spokesman was happy to report that the project to widen the road in question continues to advance on

A paternity test has proven that this sign is accurate and the worker's paycheck distribution has been modified to match the judge's ruling.

schedule, but that most of the advancements are happening at the other end of the ten-mile stretch of construction.

Asked by a reporter if you should continue to take the back way home the spokesman said yes you should but that you could shave off two more minutes by cutting through the community college parking lot to avoid those two red lights.

The report also noted that you drive too fast through the work zone, that your left rear tire needs air and that you paid too much for that muffler.

In a separate, independent study, your mechanic released findings that seem to show a correlation between the alarming number of potholes in your city and your prematurely failing suspension, tires, and vertebrae.